Signs your teen may be struggling with anxiety or depression

Angelique Foran, Clinical Psychologist and Director of Supported Minds Psychology says that it can be difficult to tell the difference between normal sadness and depression in your teenager, but that as a starting point parents should look at how long the sadness has lasted, how strong the emotions are, and how much it is impacting on your teen’s day to day activities.

“If you start to notice that your teenager hasn’t actually left the house all weekend, or that they are not socialising the way they used to, then it could be time to have a conversation with them,” Angelique says.

Signs of depression and anxiety in teenagers

Angelique says anxiety and depression are often comorbid (presenting simultaneously), but the way they show up can be quite different. Teenagers suffering from anxiety may have a big reaction to the thing that is making them feel anxious, whereas depression will generally show through mood changes and withdrawal. Indicators of anxiety and depression can be seen in physical, emotional and cognitive changes.

Some common indicators are:

Cognitive signs:

• trouble concentrating and solving everyday problems
• finding it hard to make decisions
• forgetfulness and trouble remembering information
• having negative thoughts, including thoughts about self-harm, death or suicide – for example, your child might say, ‘Life’s not worth living’ or ‘I can’t do this anymore’.

Emotional and behavioural signs:

• feeling sad, tearful, moody or irritable
• lack of interest in usual activities
• angry, out-of-character outbursts
• feeling worthless or blaming themselves for things
• withdrawal from social activities
• unexpected changes in academic performance.

Physical signs:

• feeling tired, unmotivated, or low in energy
• eating too little or too much
• vague or unexplained physical problems – i.e. stomach aches, nausea or headaches
• change in sleep patterns
• self-harm behaviour such as cutting
• not feeling rested after sleep.

How to support your teen

Talking to your teen about how they are feeling and how you can support them, is key. It’s not always an easy conversation to have, but Angelique says that teens are much better at articulating how they feel than their parents were at their age.

“This generation of teens has grown up much more psychologically minded, so it’s not unusual for teens to let the adults around them know if they need help,” Angelique says. “If you want to initiate the conversation, it is important to find the right time to speak with your teen. We suggest talking about these things while in the car – it can be more comfortable for your teenager if they don’t need to look directly at you while answering.”

Angelique says the best starting point is to let your teenager know that you have noticed some changes in their behaviours and that you want to support them, whatever they might need help with. Avoid using language that feels accusatory such as “Do you have depression?” or “Do you have anxiety?”.

“Your teenager may respond by opening up and telling you what is going on, or they might just sit on it for a bit and then come back to you when they are feeling more confident,” Angelique says. “Another practical tip is to work on ‘behavioural activation’. This is about encouraging your teen to participate in activities they once enjoyed. There may be resistance from your teenager to begin with, but it is important to keep encouraging them to get back to what they love.”

When to seek professional help

Depression and anxiety are serious mental health conditions that are unlikely to go away by themselves.

“If anxiety or depression is severely impacting the day-to-day behaviour of your teen, then it is time to seek professional help,” Angelique says. “The first point of call is to make an appointment with your GP. Schools are also very well equipped to work with students who may be suffering from anxiety or depression.”

For more information on anxiety and depression, along with support resources available, visit the Health Partners Mental Health Support and Information Hub.